Slave to the Trauma

 

Parental divorce upsets and resets an adolescents’ family life.   This adolescent captures the trauma of her parents’ divorce.  Her heartfelt feelings are revealed in her words and art: “Everyone should see what a child goes through during a divorce, and I am one of the children going through the middle of it.”

 

į̶̼͉̥͇͗͜’̴̲̯̭͓͎̽̔͊̉͝m̶̢̢̠͐́̾̓ ̵͍͎̰̣͙̼͘j̴̧͉̈͋̓̈́̂u̶̢̡̼͙͎̖̿̊̂s̴̝͚̘̰͂̎͗͆͜ͅt̶̺̬̂ ̶̥͚̼̲͊a̵̠̣̠͍̫͝ ̵̧̢͕̟̤͔̓͐̂̔s̷̘͛̆̇̕l̵̥͚̉̐a̴͉̔̈́̀̈́͂̐v̵̯͈̀̀͝e̵̺̘͖̞͛́͑ ̶̡͔̖̩͑͑̓̌̚ț̸̊̀́͂́ͅo̸͍̰̿̀͑̈́͊͝ ̷͍̌͑̓͒͝͝t̵̡̧̗̤̬̊̔͒͝ͅh̸̟̙̋͂̐̊͂ȩ̷͎̪͍̼̎̓͊̓̇ ̶͕̰̟̜͂ͅt̸̖̤̱̍͂͜r̷̓̓̏̄͑ͅa̷̮͓̘̳̐̊̚ű̴̺̔̑͜͝ḿ̷͈̐͆̈́̋a̷̫̋̿̈́͝,̶̺̣̜̘̌̏̒̕ ̸̲̝̙̿͌̊͗̎͐i̸̖̯̤͓̫͕̾͋ţ̷̡̱͙̓͋͝ ̴̥́̈́̒c̶̬͖̯̪̲͖̎̈́̓̈͝͠o̶̩̬̥̬͆͌̅̿͒̑ņ̷̨͍̰̝̱̆̇̅t̶̛͈̱̦̘͖̙͛ŕ̶̳̭͇̥̥̯̉͛̅̏ơ̷̧̰̘͂͐͘̚͝ļ̴̩̈́͂ş̷̥̤̃̈́ ̷̡̪͉̰͝m̸̧͍̱͕̰̣̽̽̇ȩ̸͆͐͗̄ ̶̻̌̿̆̓̒͋w̷̼͎̼̦̲̆͆̀͘̚h̷̬̭̖̊̽͘ĕ̶̹̀̋̓͘͝ͅn̴̢̽̐͛̐ ̶̡̧̛̙̣̝̽́̀̈́̚͜i̶̦͒ ̸̢̧̜̠͖̪̔͘d̶̨̠̠͛̀̂ő̴̲͍̔̓̿͝͝ ̸̟̘̑̓̕ǹ̴̰̖̟̳̼̔̋͒͌͜ò̷̒̽̃́̚ͅͅţ̸̼̱̩̈͗ ̴̘̔͠w̸̢̦̪̘̓͌͊͛̾͗â̶̮̮͋̈́̀ṅ̶̤͚̳t̴͙̔̓͛͠ ̴̢̛͇̩̟̏͛͋̆̐ì̵̡̘̌̅͂͠t̸͍̹͉͂͑ ̷͇̖͚̾̋ͅͅt̵̡͕͍̠̞̎͂ö̶̧̜̦̣́͝͝.̴̦̤͝ ̸͔͎͚̮̱͎̏̈́i̸̫͛̂̍̒̚͘ ̴͓̊̋̀h̵̢̜̩̒̃̋͆a̶̖̓̈́̕t̴̝̳͛̃̀̕ė̸̞̎́̆̆͘͜ ̴̆̾͊̌͂͜͠ȉ̴̢̡̧̛͙̦̈̆͌͊ť̵̛̞͎͓̫̿͗̋,̵̻͑̾̆́̕͘ ̵̹̿̈̚ä̴̞̙́͛̇̓̔ṅ̴̛͖̬̥̘͌̚͝d̸̢͈̼͚̯̬̂̓̿͝ ̷̳̺̏̏ȋ̷̦̟͖̞͍̺̓́̓t̶̨̼͈͆̈́̿̇ ̶̣̝̑̂̂̕͝ḧ̶̻̪̝̥̩̠́̿͑̕ḁ̸̰̓͂͂͠ṱ̴̯́͐͒̽̄̕ͅe̸͇̖̺͔͒s̸̨͕̾̏͝ ̷̥̟͖͎͐̆̚ͅm̸̠̓͘͝ë̶͚̲̠̳̙́́̽̿.̵̝͉̻͓́́́̐ ̵̜̂̅́̔͝i̵͎̹̍̍̇̄̎t̵̼̮̭̃̓́̉̓ ̶̱̳̀t̵͈̄̄͒͋̇e̴͈͙͚̾̽̔̀å̵̮͚̫̞͙̓͛̐r̷͕͙͖͎̂͛̒͗͒̃s̵͎̺̿̃͗ ̶̟̝̳͚̭͠m̷͇̘̰͚̦̓̓̑̆̓e̶͔̝͓͎̓́̋̓̔ ̸͎̣̑͐a̵̡̼̣̽p̵̧̨͎̥̖͕͑̾̓͑͠a̴̛͔͖͍̤̫̾͂̉̃ŕ̷̳̬̘̯̌͌̿̓͝t̷̡̙̰̹̹̣̓͌͘ ̷̲͇̌̏͆̓́̎f̵̺̝̙͙̫͖̂̀r̵̩͙̬̆̓̂̎̚͝o̵̦͓͖̊̈́̃́͘ͅm̸̡̠͔͕̰̽̎͠ ̵̧͉͕͓͐̆̅̌͠t̵̺̗̀̚h̸̯̖͈͉̑͊͘e̴̩̲̣͗ ̵̡̢͍̖̒͌̅i̸͕̦̗̒ͅn̵̖͓͍̞͌̾̉͝ş̵̈͒̓͂̍į̶̘͉̦́̈́̚͝d̷̰̩͎̗̎̆e̴̟͈̣̎͂̓͝͝ͅ ̸̙̤̳̪̼̳̐̎̋ḁ̴̆̈́̓̓ṋ̶̗͚̒͛͒̋͠d̴͎̯̾̚ ̶̳̈͑͐̅͠i̴̜̓̈́ ̷̪̲͒͑̆ḁ̴̑̀̔m̶̹̜̣̆̓̃͆̅ ̴̱͕̮̓͂̎́͗͝ḟ̸͗̃͂̓͜o̶͎̞͋͑̈́̔̎̓͜r̸̯̮̓̊ć̸̯e̷̖̜̪̼̍͑͘d̶͖̰̗̺͛̒͜ ̸̨͚̈t̷̲͑̄͑̂̚͝o̸̥̫͖͂̍ ̸̼͖̐͋̉͐ķ̴͔̥̱̮̎̄e̸̦͇̺̓̀̓͒̉e̵̟͐̌̈́̄͠ͅp̸̯̌͆̾̓ ̵̭͉̟͆̑̈́ͅȃ̴͉̭̫̲̩̽̄̽͠ ̸̮͖̐͒̉̒̏s̸̥̼̦͓̱̮͐̃͐m̶̻̬͗͗̔̂̉͝i̶̛̘̮̯͈͜l̶͚̳̎̓̈́͘é̵͙̬̙͕̂ ̵̞͔͗̈́o̸̳̦̭̅̈́͐͊n̶̙̭̎̒̊̏̏̑͜ ̸̺͙͙̒͌̏͝m̵̧̗̱̝͆̋̊y̵̞̬͐̉̍̍̽ ̵̣̃̈͠f̸̧̥͍̠͓̻̎̋̆̋ȧ̶̱̬̻̖̗̎̆c̴̨̡̨̗͇̳͝ę̶̛̦͇̪̂̇ ̸̥̋͌w̸̖͈̒ḩ̵̦̻̬̗́͆̿͝ȩ̴͚̺̺̣̩̒̑n̸̩̳͙͂̋͒͒̐̄ ̶̪̰̐̄̐̈́͆i̸̤͊̊͠ ̷̱͌f̴̰͎̹̠̈́̏̍̌̕͠e̸̳̖͉͛͋͛͝ë̴̡̢͈̣̠̲́͠l̵̫̘̰̫̜͚̑̇͐̈́̔͠ ̸̢͖͇͎̝̠̌̍̉͐͊̕s̶̤̆̌̂̔͌̓c̵̣͐́͠ą̸̖͓̜͇̎̄̏͛r̸͍͌̐͝e̵̱͉̦̚d̴͈̝̙̺͈̰̀̀̾̅ ̶͕͐́̾̑a̵̧̗̱̺̲̦̍̇̑̊n̷̛̹͗͗̃d̵̨͔̹͎̰͉̃͑̕̚͠͝ ̶̛̪͉̃̋a̶̭͉͎͗̈́͊̏l̶͔̼̲̠̱̣̎̃̓̒͝o̴̞̻͍͆̐́̈͝͠n̷̪͚̊͗̓̄͆̉ẽ̷̫͈̟͓̲̦̊.̷̢̻̰͗

“If you couldn’t read that, it says this “I’m just a slave to the trauma, it controls me when I do not want it to. I hate it, and it hates me. It tears me apart from the inside and I am forced to keep a smile on my face when I feel scared and alone.”

̴̋̐̕

“As seen in the picture, there are two versions of my personality sewn together to create what most of you know as me. ” 

“The first, is what I really feel like, a jumble of emotions that need to be let out but I keep hidden because it would just upset the people around me. The second, is the version of me that I pretend to be. I pretend to be happy all of the time so my friends will not worry. I pretend to have fun when I really need to go to a therapist and let out my emotions, but my family will not let me. I’ve ‘constructed‘ a version of me that people will like and not stress about, which is the me that resides on DeviantArt.”

“Sorry about the vent. I’m going through a rough time (mother and father divorcing, they’re bringing me into it because I am the eldest of two children and the only one who knows what is going on.”

A poignant depiction of divorce. My heart goes out to her.  Her art is extremely captivating and her words indicate she is wiser beyond her years. Curiously, how would her creativity  be revealed if she were able to focus on just being an adolescent without the divorce drama between her parents. Seemingly, she is put in the middle of an adult matter: Divorce is between the parents-About the child!

Deviant Art: Slave to the Trauma

Link: http://drawtheearth.deviantart.com/art/Slave-to-the-trauma-C-PTSD-VENT-GORE-WARNING-670749790

 

#440, Slave to the Trauma

Category: A Child’s View, Impact on child

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