Welcome to the Place for Poetry of the Personal!

Stained glass 5 pt 11 inch no spaces

Confess your feelings of betrayal, fear, heartache or humiliation that you have experienced in your divorce or co-parenting situation.

Share a setting that you regret or a situation that may have caused anguish, misery or sorrow  for your co-parent.  Or, reveal actions that may have promoted emotional pain or unhappiness for your child.

Confessions are not limited to heartache only.  Please share heartwarming moments and happy experiences you have experienced in divorce and shared parenting too!  Perhaps, something your co-parent did or said that has enhanced your co-parenting relationship.  

Here is anopportunity to share the confessions about your divorce or co-parenting experiences. This can be something that you have told to family and friends or a private thought that has remained a secret…….until now. Focus on extreme moments of individual experiences.  

This is a place to confess what your co-parent did or said that led to your feelings of betrayal, fear or humiliation. Write about something that you enacted, a statement or a thought you expressed that caused grief for your co-parent, your child or yourself.  

We learn from others experiences and situations. Perhaps in reading these scenarios, co-parents can identify with issues they are also experiencing.   Hopefully,one can see how some actions can have long-term negative effects and cause pain for their co-parent or child!   Importantly, by reading these stories co-parents can see that they are not alone in the thoughts and feelings surrounding their divorce and co-parenting relationship.

Invitation is extended to:

  • Parents who are divorced or in the process of divorce.
  • Parents and co-parents (never married) who have children.
  • Parents who have or do not have a parenting plan in place.
  • Anyone interested in a front row seat to see the despair that divorce or co-parenting issues can have on a parent and how the actions impact the child.

Sadness of Divorce

 

A parent finds this pic in their 7-yr-old child’s school bag. Expressing feelings about a parents divorce may be difficult especially in high conflict situations. Sometimes a child can share their emotions and thoughts through art.  Both houses appear on a hill at the same level indicating equality in their parent’s position (in their life and with power?).  

The child appears sorrowful and seems to have a pronounced frown. The arrows in between the thought bubbles show the need to accommodate both parents. Question marks in the bubbles appear as thoughts indicating confusion about the separation. Perhaps, even being placed in a position to choose sides.  Curiously, the question mark on mom’s side is larger and the hill somewhat higher even though Dad’s house is taller.

The figure has no hands possibly revealing emotional insecurity. No feet in a drawing may indicate a lack of control over their destiny or a sense of helplessness. This is a very unfortunate picture indeed.

Sadly, this is one picture that will not be placed on the fridge.

moms-dads-house-red

#439, Sadness of Divorce

Categories: A Child’s View, A Parent’s Heartache, Impact on child

La Divorce

 

 

This artwork reveals the dichotomy of divorce.  A happy parent with a red purse holding her daughters hand (on the right side). This part includes a heart balloon, a stuffed polka-dot animal, a tall flower with a tiny ribbon collared dog leaping for joy.  The man in the middle is wearing a hat and has facial features. There is a wide smile shaped line extending past the outline on both sides. There appears to be a text bubble (?) in pink stemming from his hat.

On the left side this parent is looking down while walking. Her purse is now smaller and in black. Thee are no flowers, balloons or animals. There is a black heart with a black line. Notably, her shoes have an added outline which may be interpreted as something weighting her down. This time the mans face has no eyes or mouth. The possible text bubble is coming from where his mouth would be.

I wonder if many parents feel like this. Especially when there is parental conflict. Seemingly, a parent may be more accepting of a divorce if they know their child is happy and taken care of.

la-divorce-m3

 #438, La Divorce

La Divorce by Sladjana Lazarevic

Pulled

 

A sad depiction of divorce! This sun and child reveal sad faces.  The child is being pulled in two directions between mom and dad. Note how the child seems closer to the mom and moms arm is much longer than dads. Does this indicate a stronger bond with mom, is mom more forceful or does the child want her to reach out? Regardless of the child’s thoughts both parents seem angry.   pulled

#437, Pulled

Not Such a Happy Family

 

This artwork captures the sentimental aspect of divorce. Each partner appears emotionally bewildered. Seemingly, they are sadly accepting their failed marriage.  The paper has the word Divorce and a red X for each signature capturing the reality and simplicity of ending a loving relationship by just signing the form. These characters truly present the emotional burden of divorce.  Divorce is difficult; the species matters not. 

Deviant Art not such a happy family 2016-12-11-at-7-23-19-pm

 

#436, Not such a happy family

Deviant Art: not such a happy family by mantislady

deviant-art-comm__not_such_a_happy_family_by_mantislady-daqv5nw-png

 

Ohana Means…

 

The narrative for this character indicates the parents were too busy arguing over left over family matters and money – which really just stressed this child out even further. Home wasn’t a place he felt comfortable nor happy in, and those harsh, ringing words his parents would throw at each other made him flinch. Still, he’d pretend everything was fine when questioned by others, he’d either keep his head low, or keep a faint smile on his face while he said “it’s going to be alright.”

This characters parents’ eventually divorced when he hit his tenth birthday, since the frequent quarrels tore them apart and they couldn’t just put down their pride for each other. His mother moved back to her home country. His father stayed because of work. This child had to make trips back and forth between them whenever holidays rolled around. Just imagine some skinny kid alone at the airport dragging his luggage around, staring at the planes that lifted off while waiting for his flight. This was his vacation. Sometimes he’d make friends on the plane with the person sitting next to him. Sometimes that would make him forget that he was always on the trip alone.

This character, at age 15, spiraled down. Started hanging around with the wrong crowd in school, got into smoking, petty theft, dyed his hair, got his ears pierced, trying out stunts that might have easily gotten him killed but hey, he didn’t care if it did at that time. These were all feats to defy his strict father and the shackles of expectation placed on him, and to taste freedom for himself. The silence at his father’s house became worse. Eden started coming home less.

At age 18 this character experiences a chain of events led him to do volunteer work, and that brought out a positive change in him after a few months. He decided to get himself together again- quit smoking, stop stealing, try to get along with everyone else, and made plans to move out on his own. 

The artist shares that at nineteen years of age, this character  doing …alright. But he still doesn’t know what’s there to live for. Still as lost as ever. 

Divorce and disruption in a child’s upbringing changes everything.

deviant-art-ohana-means-m

#435 Ohana means…

Deviant Art: Ohana means… by Memphis-Rex.

http://memphis-rex.deviantart.com/art/Ohana-Means-645369309

 

Can They Even See Me?

 

A very revealing picture! Faces are drawn in black. Angry expressions are quite prominent. Both parents are presented with mouths wide open- yelling.   Drawn in pencil is a small child in the middle. This artist seems to portray the child as small and insignificant and overlooked.   Curiously, the parent’s eyes are  pronounced and the words “Can they even see her?” are front and center.   The child looks lost as if trying to figure out what to do next. Note how she is holding a crayon of each color for the parents’ ‘words’.  A sad picture indeed!

Deviant Art can they even see me dlpage_2___ode_for_divorce__by_kat_scribbles

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#434, Can They Even See Me?