This parent offers encouragement in trying Shared Parenting! Excellent advice to parents involved in custody matters.  The take-home message is that shared parenting may not be easy; however, everyone in the family will benefit. Taking steps toward  co-parenting is an ongoing process….. in the right direction.

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Take a step in the right direction and try co-parenting. I know sometimes it may seem impossible and you might feel like your doing it alone, but it will get better. When I first started my journey there were many times where I felt defeated and wanted to give up. Heck, sometimes I still feel like that, but then I think of my beautiful son and I know he deserves both his mommy and daddy. I have no idea what I’m doing but I know I’m doing it well… or at least I’m trying too!

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Co-Parents R Us.  

Link to FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Coparentsrus

#275, Take a Step in the Right Direction

This mother shares the reality of shared parenting!  Put the child first!   She eloquently shares the emotional aspects of shared parenting-sharing holidays and life events with her co-parent.  Children need both parents in their lives.  If the child had two parents involved in their life before the divorce-the special bonding experiences should continue.

Divorce is between the parents and about the child! 

LOVE WINS!

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I am a mother of 4! Three boys with my ex husband and a daughter with my ex fiancé. Both dads have full open access to their children and are welcome to see them as much as they want. I invite them to everything they are doing and they overnights on weekends as often as possible. Was it extremely difficult the first time I had to send my babies off without me the first time? Yes. Did I cry on Halloween when their dad took them trick or treating instead of me last year? Yes. Did I see the inside the first time I handed my toddler over to step mom? D*** right!! But I did it anyway because dads are important. I couldn’t live without my daddy, so I sure am not going to take my kids dads away from them no matter why it didn’t work out.

The more ppl that love and support my children the better for them and as a mother that is all I can ask for! There is no other option that is valid. Mothers need to embrace the situation, let go of hurt and put their children first. And children need daddy time!!! Period. 
I have 4 happy, well adjusted children because they have happy, well treated fathers.

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As shared The Father’s Rights Movement, August 8, 2015.

Link to FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Fathers4kids?fref=nf

#273, Well Treated Fathers

A message to parents from someone who understands the concept of Shared Parenting!  The legal arena of divorce focuses on the parents as the plaintiff and respondent instead of the parents of the child in a custody matter.  Focus should be on the child  ……….because, shared parenting is  clearly in the best interest of the child!

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Shared parenting shouldn’t ever be entered into as a compromise for parents who both want full custody. Instead it should always be entered into as a choice made for the children who both deserve as much time as possible with both parents.

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#254, Focus on the child!

Children have the DNA of both parents! Negative comments made about one parent sends the wrong message and…may also apply to your child.  Nurturing the relationship your child has with your co-parent is critical. An act as simple as encouraging your child to pick out a gift for your co-parent on Father’s Day demonstrates care and concern.  

Support the relationship a child has with both parents! 

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A couple weeks ago, my son and I were at a store and I asked him what he wanted to get his papa for father’s day? He ran around the store looking for a gift for his papa! My son was so excited to “surprise papa” This made my heart happy.

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# 156, Positive Co-parenting

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From a financial perspective, parents working together makes sense.  Instead of spending an excessive amount of dollars on attorney fees and court costs, the money could be used for daily living, education, and vacations. Parenting together is in the best interest of the child.  See how these parents work with each other regarding legal matters.  In Shared parenting, EVERYONE in the family wins!  

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Since my ex- and I share custody, follow court orders, and follow Friend of the Court procedures, we don’t needlessly waste money on attorneys and court costs. That money goes into our child’s college fund, extra-curricular activities, and vacations.

I wish all parents were smart enough and mature enough to do the same! It’s sad when one parent has it together and the other parent is vindictive, abuses the children, violates court orders, and forces an innocent parent to spend money on an attorney and going to court to hold the irresponsible parent accountable. It takes so much away from what’s available for the children and is just another type of abuse by unfit parents.

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In the Best Interest of the Child.  Facebook link: https://www.facebook.com/InTheBestInterestsOfTheChild?fref=ts

#231, This is Shared Parenting!

An inspirational story about two parents working together for the benefit of their child!  This dad talks about why shared parenting is essential.  Treasuring the small moments makes each and every-single-second together more special.  This dad eloquently summarizes his experience with shared parenting.  

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Being a separated parent has allowed me to realize a lot of things. I don’t get my daughter everyday and I don’t get to do all the things normal dad’s get to do. Some might feel like I try to go over the top in some of the things I do or blow a bunch of hot air about being a dad.

But in reality, it’s just me learning one simple skill that many can’t master. Never take things for granted. I’ve learned every moment with my daughter is extra special. My time is limited. So, what might seem like one of those normal simple moments in life are extra super special moments in mine. Tonight while watching the fireworks, I felt an overwhelming sense of peace. The world for me stopped spinning, doubts about my impending court battle disappeared, money wasn’t a concern, and everything I love dear was beside me and in my arms. 

Everyone likes to be acknowledged.  In challenging  situations, the positive words from a stranger can have special meaning. Here is a heart- warming story about a stranger offering emotional support and recognizing the efforts of a devoted parent.  Indeed, this moment will have life-long implications for both individuals.

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Tonight at a conference my eyes were drawn to a Father sitting next to us who had three young sons in his care. Probably ages 12, 9 & 7.
I watched on as I was amazed at the affection this Father showed for his sons.
No matter what they asked him, he gave each one his full attention. He kissed & hugged them continually.
I was wondering why I was so drawn to know his story. Where was Mum? Was he a single Dad? Did his wife pass away? I wasn’t sure but I’m eyes were transfixed on his love for them, and also the love the eldest son showed for his younger brothers.
When the conference finished I felt to tell him “he’s a great dad and that he needed to hear that”
As I walked past I leant down to his ear and said “I want you to know I was watching you with your boys, your a wonderful Father”
You should have seen his face light up. It was like he was shocked and then again so happy at that comment.
“Thank you” he said…
As I left the Auditorium I told my husband what I said and he also said he was going to say the same thing.
Ten minutes later my husband ran into him again where we were all picking up our kids.
He walked up to my husband and just asked how our night was.
I then approached their conversation and this man still intrigued me.
“What was his story we wondered?”
As my husband asked him where he was from and about the kids, he started to tell us how he brought his 5 kids (yes he also had 2 Girls) down from Brisbane for this 1 week conference. That he wanted more than anything to give his kids the joy of experiencing this and to have this time with them.
My ears starting to tune in, I was starting to feel I think I do have a single Dad here.
Then he drops the penny.
He hadn’t seen his kids in 3 months, they live further away from him, he’s in a messy court battle with his ex, he’s been told he’s not a good father and the story goes on.
I knew it. God works in mysterious ways doesn’t he. The amount of times I have had separated/divorced parents put in my path I can’t tell you.
I put my hand on his arm and said well I do understand as you are what I write and talk about.
With my eyes filling up I shared with him what I do (Voice4kids) and he was shocked. Even he said wow, this is a God moment.
I shared with him my heart (and yes I cried) as I told him what an amazing Dad I saw in him etc…
It was such a lovely moment that my husband and I were able to witness tonight.
I told him I feel to bless him with my 2 Books and he can’t wait to receive them.
*THESE ARE MOMENTS I LIVE FOR.
*THESE ARE THE MOMENTS I PRAY FOR.
*THIS IS WHY I DO WHAT I DO.

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As shared on http://www.voice4kids Facebook page:

Link: https://www.facebook.com/voice4kidskarlalee?fref=ts&ref=br_tf

WEBSITE: http://www.karlalee.com

http://www.voice4kids

EMAIL: author.karlalee@gmail.com

#210, A Tender Moment

This wife and mother talk about her parent’s divorce, the blessing, and the difficulty of divorce.  Parents staying together until the children are older is sometimes an option. She reveals the goodness of God and how God is the foundation for the success of her marriage. (Comments to Turned Out All Right? (post #177, posted June 16, 2015)

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My parents divorced when I was a freshman in college. I remember my Dad saying to me that he was going to leave when my younger brother went to college. He waited to leave until we were older. I am sad that my parents marriage did not last, but in looking back, I am glad that they stayed together for as long as they did, and especially when we were younger.

I have now been blessed to be married for 21 years. I am grateful to God for my husband, and I know that we are still married because of having God and Jesus in our lives. Marriage is a blessing, but at times is also difficult. I don’t know how marriages that do not have God as a foundation make it.

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Comment to Turned Out All Right?, by JH, July 29, 2013.

Link to article: http://www.marriage-ecosystem.org/turned-out-all-right.html

#178, God’s Goodness